Tonite! Going back to Shea Stadium for Mets v Yankee game! One of the toughest tickets in NYC, and I got 4 of 'em. Going with some guys at work, and in our Fantasy Baseball league. Should be a BLAST!

A "must read" article -- The Seattle Times: Microsoft and AOL duel for the Internet crown. In short Microsoft is trying to control your access to the internet with its technology, while AOL is trying to control the content through its acquisition of Time Warner... the worlds largest media provider. Both companies want to control the Internet by limiting your choices of what you can see, and how you will see it... and pay for it. A POX ON BOTH THEIR HOUSES!

OK, the softball season is over, and so is my 5 year career as a coach of U14 girls softball. I have to admit, I feel a sadness and a huge void now that it is over. This year was such a joy for me (and I hope the girls). This last year I was fortunate to have the greatest group of kids to coach. The enthusiasm, joy, dedication, fun, skill, intensity was so evident you could feel it all around you. We placed second in the league with a 9-2 record, beating every team but one. Those 2 games could have gone either way. There is no doubt that we had the best team overall... best hitting, fielding, baserunning. That "other" team had one great pitcher that no one could hit--thats all. By the end of the season, our team was awesome. We won one game by 40 runs, and the last game against one of the better teams 16-4.

Like I said, the end of the season creates an emptiness in my being. The right thing to do is to fill that void with renewed enthusiasm towards my professional life. I will try to place that same energy into my career... whether that means at my present job, or in a search for new opportunities.

Listening to CNN live about the McVeigh execution. Its such a strange thing. I feel a compelling urge to listen, though I am sickened by it. I doubt if this act will heal the wounds of the families of the victims, or bring closure to their suffering. I don't see how this accomplishes anything positive at all. Yet I feel the man deserves to die.

Got my hair chopped yesterday. I had this strange feeling since Friday, that if I cut my hair, I would release some of the negative energies that were making me feel down. So, early Sat morning, I had my hair buzzed real short. I think it worked. Nothing but peach fuzz on the top now.

Full day yesterday. Besides the buzz cut, Mom, Dad, Di and Andy came over for lunch... went to "A Day at the Park"... all the kids from town were out and we watched Andy in a break dance show. Then went to a minor league baseball game (New Britain Rockcats). Rach and friend went with us. It was Blues Brothers night. Everyone at the ball park got free Blues Bros. Sunglasses, and Blues Brothers look-a-likes entertained between innings. It was a gas!

I am in a bummed out mood. Not real happy about my professional situation. Can't be to explicit here. I feel a deteriorating situation exists. My concern is in two areas. First, the state of this company in general. Second, my own place in the company's hierarchy. The effect of all this is it is more difficult to be motivated, and to stay on task... a general melaise and depression sinking in.

It is Friday, though, and I should try to get pumped up for the weekend.

Bought Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon DVD last night. We watched it 2 times, switching audio between Manderin, English, and Director narrative. IMHO, this is one of the greatest films of all time. A perfect balance between Asian mysticism, romance, martial arts, gogeous music, beautiful cinematography. I can't get enough of watching the fighting scenes. They are more like an intricate modern ballet than martial arts. Amazing... no computer generated special effects. All done with wires. A wonderful, wonderous movie.

Ahhh! Our girls softball team wins 44 - 4. The game was a real embarrasment. It was actually uncomfortable playing such a blow out. The game ended in the top of the 4th inning by the other team giving up... not wanting to play anymore. There are some nice pictures of Rach playing ball on our Photo Page that I added yesterday.

Weekend Update - Softball win against Stafford 18-1; Shampoo basement rug, cleaning out weeks of sick cat vomit and poop (aren't you glad to know that!); Sushi, Borders and Books - Excellent!; Drive a bucket of balls with David... more Sushi; Mow lawn in the rain; Help out at softball practice for summer league.

If music is a big part of your life you have GOT to check out the All Music Guide site. I've killed a few hours here over the last couple of days. Its got album reviews, biographies, discographies, music maps... etc. Its a site that is put together very well for just surfin' around.

Last night... Sushi. Tried rainbow roll and spicy salmon hand roll... mmmmmm! C says "sushi good... blogging bad".

Here is a first hand account of the Living Colours, Kaycee hoax. Its a pretty amazing tale. I had seen the Living Colours blog the day after it was announced she had died. I read back a few months of posts, and was actually moved by it all. At first, I chuckled when I found out it was a hoax... but now I see how elaborate it was, and how many people really got sucked into it.

Now, I am an admitted web geek, but its hard for me to imagine all these folks who have such deep emotional relationships with people that exist to them only in cyberspace. whew!

Long time... no blog. Just not much to say. Get up, go to work, come home, veg out. Only excitement these day's are our softball games. On Wed. we won 18-1 without 2 of our best players. Rach hits monster HR. Speaking of which, Rach's school team season is over. She hits 2 dingers in her last game. Our travel team has another game tonite in Stafford, one of the better teams. Looking forward to that. Nothing planned for the weekend. Will have to go out to a movie or dinner or both... any suggestions?

Rachel got home from Quebec around 9 PM last night. We (me, claire and rach) sat and talked for about an hour. She went through her entire trip with us, and told us every little detail... everything she saw, ate, friends she made, etc. While she spoke, and we drank our tea together, I kept looking at her and thinking how grown up she is, how intelligent, poised and beautiful she has become.

Slow paced relaxin' weekend. Caught a couple of movies. Went to bonsai exhibit at Eliz Park... very interesting. Gotta give this another try (1st attempt at bonsai failed miserably). Ate greek food at Tapa's. Stopped in at Di's. This morning, updated some web pages, and just hangin out. Sun's out for the first time. Maybe it'll stay that way - will have to mow lawn if it does. Pretty much a kidless weekend. Rach away in Quebec (returns tonite), and Dave has discovered Drivers License = Freedom.

Visited Mom & Dad today. I brought some Boston Chicken for lunch. It was a very nice time. So many people bitch about their parents... truth is, I really enjoy spending time with them. We always have good conversation, I enjoy their company. They are never judgmental. I appreciate their depth of experience and knowledge in so many things. They are just plain good people. Thats why they are so well liked by those around them. I love my parents dearly.

Probably the best collection of Blogs is the ageless project. Its a collection of blogs referenced by the age group of the authors. Its a great idea and a great site. Check out the 1950's for mine.

My latest *Waste of Time* is reading other peoples weblogs. It an addicting pastime (and I guess Voyeuristic). Best way to do this is to go to Weblogs.Com or to Blogger and click on one of the Most Recently Updated links. You have to wade through a lot of junk to find something good, but its kinda fun. Already wasted 1 1/2 hours this AM doing this.

Woke up early this AM to drop off Rachel at the bus for her trip to Quebec, Canada with her french class. Its her first time on an extended (4 days) trip away from us. She was really psyched about going. No doubt we will miss her and worry about her! On the other hand, she is thrilled to get away from us. So it goes!

Oh happy day. Laura got her MRI and it shows no further tumor growth. A great relief. Maybe she has beaten this thing.

Read this little tidbit in Emily's Blog. -- How true, and very well stated.
"Dilbert's "Salary Theorem" states that "Engineers and scientists can never earn as much as business executives and sales people.

This theorem can now be supported by a mathematical equation based on the following two postulates

Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.
Postulate 2: Time is Money.

As every engineer knows Power = Work / Time

Since Knowledge = Power
Time= Money
Knowledge = Work / Money.

Solving for Money, we get:
Money = Work / Knowledge.

Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity, regardless of the amount of work done.

The Conclusion: The less you know, the more you make."

Listened to Sen. John McCain on the Imus show this morning. What a refreshing anti-politician this guy is. It made me reflect on what a lousy pair of candidates the two parties threw at us last election. Al "Cinton Butt-Boy" Gore and George "Corporate Bought and Sold" W Bush. Shame upon this country for getting to this state of affairs. Anyway, McCain (Rep.) actually defended Jeffords switch to the Dems, saying that the cause of this is the Republican strong arm tactics to try and force its members to toe the party line and to stifle any descent. That is what drove Jeffords to his decision. McCain also reiterated his views that Corporate money and special interests have corrupted the system, and until that is addressed, the will of the voters will never be heard, and the American people will be disenfranchised.

I applaud Jeffords for his move. It will make a tremendous effect on policy making, with all the senate committee leadership and the majority leader moving away from Republicans. Hopefully a Bush backlash has begun.

Beware Road Warriors - David got his drivers license.

Some significant job cuts have occured at work. There were good reasons for doing so... still you don't like to see it happen. Fortunately, it did not affect me or my department, since we have downsized recently. I wonder about some organizational changes that have happened, and ponder my own future at MJ. Need to speak with SM about all this later today.

A tragic accident happened over the weekend to a Rockville HS kid at a post prom party at the beach in RI. The kids had dug a 6 foot hole in the sand, and were diving into it. Matt Gauruder dove head first into the pit, and the sand collapsed around him. The other kids (there were lots of friends with him) tried to dig him out, but the sand kept coming in around him. When they finally pulled him out, he had been buried for over 10 minutes. He was rushed to the hospital and kept on life support for some time, but they finally pulled the plug yesterday.... chilling. 17 year old kid, just horsing around. How does it affect the kids that were there with him and tried to save him.

Despite the tragedy at my son's school, it is a big day for Dave. He is running for class President (if they have the election) today, and he also has his test for his Drivers License. GOOD LUCK DAVID!

Oh yeah... we won in softball last night 15-2. Rach hits HR and double. I had a couple 6th grade kids from slow pitch playing up on our team. Sarah played an incredible defense in the infield.

Rented the movie "Antitrust". Pretty good flick. Target audience was young computer geeks... but none the less, it was an enjoyable techno thriller. I knew I would like the movie as soon as I saw the openning credits scroll by as HTML code - nice touch. The plot is a fictionalized Bill Gates taking over the world scenario, and a young hot shot programmer screwing up his plans. The computer scenes were fairly realistic for this kind of movie. Lots of Unix stuff.

Saw a wonderful movie last night called "Widow of St. Pierre". Sad ending. French flick with subtitles. Highly recommend it. It was a very nice evening of movie and going out for a drink afterwards with my honey.

Unfortunately, killed 4 of 5 fish in my fish tank. I have had a terrible problem with green cloudy water, so I siphoned out most of the tank yesterday and refilled it. I think I contaminated some of the water with a little soap or something. One fish and one sucker fish survive.

I've been listening to a lot of Miles lately. I love Miles Davis. The man was the greatest.

• Listen to BIRTH OF COOL -. Strange arrangements, tuba's, french horns... and Miles sensitive sylistic soloing.
  
• Hear KIND OF BLUE - maybe the greatest jazz album ever recorded. Miles has a way of kickin back... holding back the beat, creating a strange tension with his playing.
  
• Dig MILES SMILES - the great quintet from the 60's. Miles, Wayne Shorter, Herbie Hancock, Ron Carter and Tony Williams. Experiments into new rhythms, compositions, soloing, creating moods with his music different than anything done before or since. Tony Williams dancing on the symbals. Footprints is my favorite Miles cut.
• Groove to BITCHES BREW. The landmark album that started Jazz Fusion. Chick, McLaughlin, Zawinal, Herbie, Airto. Electric, African, Exotic, Percusive, Creative, Inspiring.

All very cool stuff. Get a hold of these CD's. Listen

OK, nothing happened today as predicted. "Paranoia strikes deep, into your heart it will creep" (Crosby Stills and Nash [actually I hate CSN]). Its too bad that a good part of my life must exist in a state of paranoia... but such is life. That feeling is not without basis, so I contiue to stay on guard.

Did you ever get that feeling.... something bad is about to happen? A knot in the pit of your stomach, a calm before a storm, a bad taste in your mouth, a tense feeling that can't be relaxed? Something may happen tomorrow. Question is, will it happen to me or those around me (or both).

Lost "the big game" against TG's team. Feel like we got robbed when two clear outs were called safe, prolonging the inning where TG scored mucho runs. We started to come back, but couldn't make up the deficit. Rach hit a key double clearing the loaded bases for 3 RBI's. Our girls played great except for a couple of defensive lapses. Mary is one hell of a great pitcher, and we still managed to score 7 runs.

I haven't updated much due to time constraints and some blogger problems.

Here is an update. Softball: Big game tonite against other Vernon Team. This is always a close, hard played game... looking forward to some good stiff competition. All our other games have been blow-outs.Work: Situation bad... maybe getting worse. I will know more by end of week. ATT Cable: Met with them Monday evening... These guys are scum. IMHO their only mission is to maximize revenues while investing as little as possible in the system and they will do so with complete disregard to the Agreement they signed giving them the 13 year franchise rights.

Mothers Day - Its been a really tough year for my Mom. Since the stroke about one year ago, she has had to come back physically through a difficult period of physical therapy. She succeeded in getting most of her physical strength back, but the stroke has paid its toll mentally. Mom's short term memory is weakening. Still, it is hopefull to see she still has her wits about her, and her quick sense of humor. It was great talking with her this morning. With age and health becoming an increasing factor, she is still a strong woman. Love you, Mom.

Had a nice day with our family. Took a ride to the shore line for a great lobster dinner at Abbots.

Watched 60 Minutes. They had a segment on the execution of Timothy McVeigh. I am generally against the Death Penalty... but if anyone deserves to know the horror of taking their last breaths as a consequence of their actions its McVeigh.

Had a day away from the office today. Quick trip to Boston with R & S to look at some digital print equipment. Learned some new stuff which is always nice, but realistically, I don't think we will be buying any new presses at this time.

While away, poor RD gets buried with work... lots of high pressure stuff too. The guy is a trooper.

Meanwhile, SB last night. We win again 11-4. Brought in some younger players as subs. They did great for first timers. Lots of fun watching them light up with excitement playing with the older girls.

To help get Cable Internet access for the town of Vernon (ATT is trying to weasle out of their commitment to do so), I drafted a letter to the DPUC, and ran it past an attorney friend of mine. He edited my letter, and this is the result. Gordon... you are freakin brilliant!!! I have read this letter a dozen times and each time it just amazes me. GREAT JOB. Thanks a bunch. It goes out registered mail tomorrow.

Haven't blogged in a couple of days. I have been consumed with battling ATT cable and trying to work within the groundrules set by the State of CT DPUC. Its been quite an education. I have talked with numerous officials from ATT, DPUC, Town Council members, press, etc. whew!!!

Meanwhile, another SB game, won 37-9 or something like that. Rach hits another HR... incredible. I had a few catches with her this weekend. The girl throws harder and more accurately than the old man. I had to endure her telling me that I throw like a panzie! Guess in my old age, I just don't have it anymore (probably never did).

Just got back from Mike Stern/Dennis Chambers concert in little ole' Vernon of all places. This concert Rocked! Absolutely Jazz Fusion at its best. Incredible. Stern is my new favorite guitarist. It was also a real pleasure to experience this with my son. We were both blown away.

Ooops, almost forgot to mention our visit to Mom and Dad's yesterday. A great day... got to see Barb. We are so very fortunate to have such close family ties. This extends through three generations. My kids are so wonderful with my folks. They are thoughtful intelligent outgoing, warm hearted people. Its incredible and rare that grandparents, parents, and kids can appreciate each others company as we do.

Here it is, my recent emails to ATT regarding cable Internet access. A service that they had promised in the Franchise Agreement, that they are now reneging on. Copies of these emails also went to the Department of Public Utilities (DPUC).

For about 2 years, I have been trying to find out when our region will get cable modem access (we are too distant from phone co. for DSL). The cable companies have been ignoring my requests, lying to me, stonewalling me. About 8 months ago I found a contact that provided me with the Franchise agreement that shows AT&T *Broadband* was required to provide this access by May 22, 2001. All this time, an AT&T official told me that they will make this deadline. Now that the deadline is less than 3 weeks away, AT&T is trying to get out of there responsibility because they do not have the capital to invest in Cable Internet. What bullshit. They signed this agreement that granted them a 13 year monopoly on cable service in this area, and now they are trying to weasel out of their commitments. I have contacted the DPUC (public utility commission), and so far they seem to be interested in following up on this. I will also contact the local newspaper next week... This could get interesting. I may post some of the communications with AT&T and the DPUC up to the web.

It's Friday - Yeeha! The load has lightened at work. Alot less pressure and more manageable workload. Very interesting conversation this morning with AK. Perhaps some interesting and lucrative oportunities may come my way... who knows.

Meanwhile, Dave's condition is not healing all that well. He sees doc later today. Rach not feeling all that well either. Have a big game tonite under the lights. Hope enough girls show up to field a team.

Dave seems to be feeling better. SB game tonite, won by a lopsided 24-3. Rach hits another HR.

Work continues to piss me off. I am getting no support. In fact when I bring up the subject the result is even worse.

Update: Dave had the cyst drained. He will need surgery, but not until this current bout is healed. Rach had a great SB game, hitting 2 home runs as we won 25 - 8.

Dave's Pilonidal cyst has *reared* its ugly head (arh arh... get the pun). Poor kids in a lot of pain. Seeing the doc this PM. Hope that it doesn't require surgery, but that is a distinct possibility. If this leads to more missed school, that complicates his situation much more. I'll leave early to pick up Rach to go to our SB game while Dave is at the doctors. Busy, busy, busy at work...life is soooo hectic.

A glorious day and a hot week ahead. Weather is sunny and warm for the entire week. We have three games this week and Rachel has 5. Try to get in a practice today for pitchers. It would be a great day for it.

First softball game of the season and we lost. Not a bad loss though. They won by one run in their last at bat (6-5). We played against maybe the toughest pitcher in the league and we kept up with them the whole game. Rach hit a double and a single... and Becca hit a MONSTER HR. Next game is Monday.

Watched the movie Contact on TV last night. An incredible underated movie. Not your typical Star Wars/Aliens movie. The essence of this flick is the juxtoposition of science vs. religion... Faith vs. Physical evidence. In the end, the "pure" scientist must rely totally on faith to explain her voyage. While the movie Contact is great. READ the novel by Carl Sagen... its far deeper and significant.

Happen to tune in to see some of CNN Crossfire. It was Dr. Joycelyn Elders v. Rev. Falwell. Falwell actually blurted out "Dr. Elders, you are a NUT CASE". What an egotistical self centered, intollerent jerk this Falwell is. How presumptuous is this guy that he assumes that everyone must adopt HIS "Christian" values. We are not all Christians are we... and he does not have a monopoly on the interpretation of values!

Elders is a couragous women for speaking her mind. She says what most people feel... no holds barred (e.g. "Surveys indicate that 70% of men masturbate. The other 30% are lying"). Nice job Joycelyn. You are a breadth of fresh air. Shame on CNN for constantly cutting her off for stupid commercial breaks. Hope that wasn't intentional. Human sexuality is really a fascinating topic.

Haven't blogged in a couple of days. Nothin to say. Weathers been nice 'n hot, works been a little slow. Softball team had its first scrimmage, and we did great (won!).

Finished the job. Looks pretty good! Check it out!

Been ripping up the carpet in the livingroom, dining room and hallway this weekend. You can see all the action if you check out the Laster webcam. Nice wood floors underneath that have been protected by the carpet and matting. We bought a couple of Jute mats at Pier1.

BTW. Leaped into first place on one of my fantasy baseball leagues... floundering in 8th in the other.

I lost my temper with my son last night, but he just pushes the envelope with all his electronics and computers. He needs to be more focused on school at the moment. But... I regret getting so angry with him. I need to patch it up.

I have seen some very interesting debates on the internet broadcast of Tim McVeigh's execution. I really don't know where I stand on the issue, but the debate is an interesting one. Maybe it should be broadcast... bring back public executions. If people see the cruel, barbaric nature in ourselves, maybe we would think twice about capital punishment. Maybe public execution would serve to be more of a deterent (i doubt it)? It certainly will bring the debate about capital punishment front and center. If we are going to do it, why are we so ashamed that it is done behind closed doors. Then there is the first amendment argument. How can the government stifle such news reporting on 1st amendment grounds. Maybe it is considered obscene... If showing the act of making love is obscene, surely one man putting another to death is. Then again, we see this acted out on TV and the movies everyday, why can't it be seen live? It seems to me that if we are so ashamed of what we are doing (executions) that we are compelled to do it behind closed doors, we should not be executing people at all.

Feeling alot better. Its Friday, I have made it through a tough work week. Next week will be back to full staff (minus my CSR). The crazy dude from Rochester is coming, and that will make things interesting/fun. Hoping to go out to dinner/movie with wifey and party down!

Coaching girls softball... is it great or what. Besides just loving the game, I have a great group of kids. They are happy, fun to be around, try hard, talented group of girls (with only a couple of exceptions). They are easy to coach, want to learn, take instruction well... and are there to have fun. The season hasn't started yet, but I have enjoyed the practices and I hope they have also. I think it will be a great season... my last season coaching since our rec league has no program for Rachel next year. My goal is to be more layed back than previous years, and just have fun with it, and put less pressure on the girls and myself to win games... (we will see if I can really do that).

Ugh, I feel like all my biorythms are at a low. Physically have a stomach ache and muscle pains (pulled something at softball practice), mentally and emotionally drained at work. Meeting today... and I know I will run into some kind of conflict.

Random... Psychologists have developed so many disorders and disabilities and syndromes, that they seem to be used as excuses (or crutches) rather than remedies for peoples problems (IMHO).

Another Monday, and I am not going to be a happy camper. Very shorthanded at work and covering for 2 other people.

Besides being pissed off about work situation, yesterday I raked the lawn and did spring clean-up for most of the day. Now my arms are aching and I have a big open blister on my hand that is nagging me.

Oh, well, I should just stop bitching and get to work, I suppose.

It's 3:45 AM, and I'm up doin this... Cats been scratchin at the door, so I put em out. Went out to a mexican restaurant with a friend from work and his girlfriend. Had some serious marguiritas and steak quesadillas. They were great, but as usual, that mexican food just lays in the ole stomach like a brick all night. Whew. I guess I'll down some Tums and back to bed.

Came across Joe Jennet's **the ageless project**. Great idea, Joe! Its hard to find Bloggers of our generation, but they are out there. Thanks for doing this. Hope to see mine posted on your site.

Wasted the entire morning messing around with pics I took from our Day At NY Mets Shea Stadium. Check out the link to see them. Note the panorama shot (3 pics stitched together). Lot's to do today, including getting equipment and uniforms, and calling the girls for our softball team. Better get to it.

Looks like I won't get that cooperation that I had counted on (see last post). Feels like I have been turned on and stabbed in the back. Next week will be tough at work. But that's the way it goes.

Fun, fun night at the NY Mets game last night. Besides spending Q time with my daughter and Gordon & Bethy, it was a great game. 1-0 in 10 innings. Mets won at their last at bat with a manufactured run. Ziele walks, Shinjo bunts him over to 2nd, Ordonez hits a hard liner down 3rd scoring Ziele for the winning run. Great pitching, good defense, some exciting plays. Just a great night, and a great game.

That ride home at 1 AM through a heavy fog was a bit of a bummer, though.

Back to work. That new "team mermber" didn't quite work out. Now I am looking for other options to get the jobs entered and some CSR support from others in the organization. Hopefully I'll see if I can get the cooperation from another department.

It's Friday, get through the day, have some nice plans for Sat. night... Kids have off next week... get my Girls Softball team off the ground with some phone calls, get equipment, and practice starts Tuesday.

Oh, yeah... Rach did make the middle school softball team, and was made co-captain. She's pumped (so am I). What a great confident, fun loving, smart kid.

The day from HELL. Walked in, we screwed up a print job, our main production mac is screwed up, accounting's Winblows computer got screwed up, new CSR is out sick, I'm running around like crazy trying to fix both machines at the same time at opposite ends of the building.

I hate our Winblows machines. When working, they are not that bad, but when they get screwed up, you can waste a whole day on a simple problem. Today, I put in a modem, and all the networking got screwed up. The NIC card drivers got completely corrupted because I put in a modem... figure that out?

Only saving grace is that I can look forward to going to a Met game tomorrow evening with my daughter. Hope the weather holds out.

What's new... got hair cropped real short (nuthin but peach fuzz left on top!), Softball practice was real nice in 70 degree weather, BTW, Rach finds out if she made the softball team at school today (she will).

Monday AM - New week. Should be a busy one. We have a new Customer Service Rep starting in Digital, probably will ice a deal on almost $100K worth of file servers and network hardware, softball practice, Mets game Thurs., Claire's working all week... WOW!

Good weekend in Fantasy Baseball... 2nd and 3rd place in my two leagues.

Last night - Passover at Sis, Diana's house. Skipped the religious ceremonies as we do not have traditional religious convictions, but joined my sister Di, and Laura's family and my folks afterwards. Everyone looked real well, and in good spirits. Had a real fun time. Especially staying late at Diana's. After Parents and Bergers left, we stayed later, playing chess, and having some good conversations with the David and Marty.

Disturbing news... one of my nephews is doing something that will potentially have an extreme negative impact on the rest of his life. That has been real disturbing to me. How can a parent let his/her son make such a poor, life altering decision? IMHO, they are taking this far too lightly. I know that a person needs to do whats best for himself, but the needs of other family members (esp. ones in crisis) should also be of concern. I wish I had a better relationship with my nephew, I would really like to talk to him about all this, but I know I cannot. The whole family dynamic here is really troubling... but who am I to judge???

Saw the movie Pollack, about the Avant Garde artist. Interesting movie, about a lousy guy. Not a great movie, but one that help you to understand his art. We saw his work at the MOMA museum last month, and it was a thrill to see his painting. I really like this kind of art and music. Though if I listen to Free Jazz at home, it drives everyone out of the house.

Yesterday was a gorgeous day. Warm, sunny. Had a nice dinner with Claire at a Sushi bar. Today, have a new team member starting at work. Let's hope it works out. Another Fantasy BB draft at 5 PM. Guess I'll just have to come home early ;-) . Big deal... I have to go in to work on Saturday.

Hoping to catch movie Pollack this weekend.

Much better day today at work. Held my emotions in check. Acted much more rationally than I had last couple of days. I definetly got more accomplished that way. Isn't there some kind of saying that its better to fight fire with water than fight fire with fire??? If not, I just made one up! Bottom line is, maybe I can work things out at work, but I also need to be cautious and be aware of other options.

Fantasy BBall... clinched a big deal. Ten player trade. That was fun.

My work situation is getting more and more frustrating. I wish I could elaborate more, but that would not be a good idea at the present. I do need to keep my emotions in check in order to try and make the best of a bad and worsening situation. I'll try to do that and keep other options open at the same time. I have remained at MJ for this period because of my respect and friendship with its principal... but it appears that his commitment to me and the department is faltering. Not sure why, because we have been succesful (profitable).

Back from Roch. Nice trip. Diaczenko family get togethers are a lot of fun, as long as the family does not fight. Thankfully, they did not. The three nephews, Mike, Mat, Jay, are, and always have been, the center of attention. This has been so since they were babies, children, teens, and now that they are adults with families of their own. Its not much different from when they were 16. Joking, physical, goofy as hell. Got lots of pics and will post them sometime this week. New babies including twins from Mike and Ilene.

Mom and Pa Diaczenko are so oblivious to the modern world. They have such a different set of sensibilities and values and cultural veiwpoints. Its amazing. Not bad ... just different. They may as well be from a different planet.

Was able to listen to the Uconn Lady Huskies on the radio... too bad they lost. They were awsome in the first half, then fell apart. Oh well. This year is over for them, we'll see about next year.

Leaving for Roch-acha this PM. Father-In-Law's 80th Bday. Looking forward to the trip, little getaway, diff surroundings, diff crowd of people to talk to. Looks like nasty weather for the trip, though. Only downside of the weekend trip is missing Lady Husky games.

Bringing Titanium along. Ooooh she's hot.

Whew! Baseball Draft was a success. Good time had by all. Sweated it out a little as there was a potential of 3 no shows... but everyone came out to play. Glad that Spence made it... man, he has not looked well lately -- too many burdens to carry (he needs this diversion)... Also glad Gordon was there. He is a good friend. Stuck around with Gordon after everyone else left for another round. I know this Fantasy Baseball thing is a useless unproductive hobby, but its a good time, a nice diversion... so tough shit!

MJBL Draft tonite! I'm pyched, and a little on-edge. I'm in charge, set everything up, reserved the room, printed out the worksheets and other stuff... now, if everyone shows up, we're golden. Got a bunch of newbies commin on board, maybe a couple not so reliable. If we pull it off, a great nite of beer and baseball with the boys!

Barb and Rog posted pics and story of their trip to Australia and NZ. Whew!! Breathtaking stuff. That's what I want to do when I retire and have 3 weeks or more to travel. Don't think that will happen soon though.

Tomorow is Fantasy Baseball Draft. I run the league, and need to organize everything. It's a bit of work, but alot of fun, and helps bring the group of guys (mostly from work) together.

work...accountants...concerned

It's Monday morning, but I'm feelin' good. Great weekend with freinds and family... copped Mets tickets, watched UCONN womens bball. Supposed to get snow today (1-3 inches).

Visit with folks went well. They both looked well considering age setting in and clouding their thinking. Mostly concerned about Mom, but you can see it in Dad as well. Just a part of getting on in years. Happens to us all. Its a good feeling to be close to them and spend time in-person... give 'em a hug when they leave.

Today might be crazy at work. Val is out sick, Roger may need to leave early and I have someone coming in from out of town to look at our network and give us a proposal on expanding our network and file server capacities.

Yowee! Got my Mets tickets. Will be going to three games this year. Mets v Braves (real soon), Yankees, Pirates. Thank's Gordon! It was a great idea... and a nice evening last night.

Today's blog is from a computer that David built in the basement. We now have a WinTel box infecting our network. Hopefully he will be using it to run Linux, Be, or some other OS.

Other happenings... Lady Huskies win another round, watched Notre Dame game (they'll be tough); Mom & Dad coming over for lunch today.

Apple - Mac OS X was released today. I am pretty impressed with the reaction. Advanced sales were huge and new apps are being developed in large numbers. Apples stock got a big bump yesterday. I was reading the press releases by even the "non-Apple" press, and everyone of them praised the OS and what it means to Apple. You MUST read this article from Red Herring.

I was even talking to a Unix geek that worked for an ISP that we use at work. He was psyched about X because of its Unix command line shell and Unix underpinnings. Can you imagine if all those Unix dudes latch on to Macs?

I wasn't planning on buying it... but now I am curious as hell about it. Maybe...just maybe I'll pick it up from Small Dog. Maybe its a good time to buy some Apple stock too.

OMG, three posts in one day... Another Friday night and I'm home alone. Wife out w/friends, kids doing their own thing, and I'm left home on the 'puter again. I must get a life! Actually don't mind it a bit. Wrote up the Ground Rules for my Fantasy Baseball league of which I am the Commish, and posted it on the league page. Now will pour meself a drink, put on some tunes, read my book, and maybe watch a little March Madness.

Gee. Just can't get goin. Started the day feeling really "up". Got to work, things slowed down, don't see much picking up around here (work). It looks like we will get busy, but the floodgates just never seem to open. Right now... just don't have any energy to get things done. There are some things I could be doing... but I just can't get things off the ground. Too late on a Friday to start a major project... so I'll just ride it out till the end of the day, doing things that are needed as they hit me... maybe leave a little early. Next week start again with a little more gusto.

Great night, last evening was... Had a fantastic dinner at Max Amore's courtesy of Mom and Dad (Thanks!), Spoke with folks afterward, their spirits were high. Good news with Laura's health. Seems like all the biorythms are kickin' in. And of course, its Friday, so we have the weekend to look forward to. We'll be watching Womens Husky Basketball, and Saturday our friends and I will be splitting up an 8-pack of season Mets tickets! And, I was called a couple nights ago and asked to coach our girls softball team. Things are looking up!

Wish things at work were more on the up side. Though I did have a good day yesterday tinkering with our network, and setting up a second wireless Airport base station on our Network. Apple technology is so cool. It still amazes me.

Today is our 26th wedding aniversary. Claire was my teenage sweetheart. She has been my very best friend... really my only true friend. I am not one that requires much social or human interaction, but when the need is there, she fulfills it on every level... friend, companion, lover, shoulder to lean on, etc. I can't imagine ever not loving her.

Decided what action to take to address Son's grades, and discussed with Dave this morning. 1- He will cut back hours at work to only 1 evening during the week, and 1 weekend day. 2- No computer for 2 hours per night (I remove keyboard and mouse). 3. I want to see the work he has done each night. Its pretty lenient, but addresses the problem. The poor kid is under a lot of pressure. Working 4 days a week and having Yearbook, School newspaper, and homework duties is too much. When he is doing homework, he has AIM going in the background, is ripping CD's, and blasting his stereo... too many distractions.

Cutting back to 1 day of work, and removing those distractions should give him lots more time, and releve some of those pressures. He will still have some hours to make some $$, and will have his computer back after his homework is done for some "play" time.

Now... MY problem is I never follow through on these things. Its up to me to "keep with the program".

Finally received the Titanium Powerbook for work that was back ordered for a month. Ooooh is it sweet. 1 inch thick, light as a feather and a gorgeous huge wide screen for DVD movies. I had seen pictures in mags, but it has to be seen to be appreciated.

Got home from work to see a letter from RHS. Sons midterm grades have been tankin' big time. Really pissed. What do I do, make him quit work, scale back hours, take away computer... he has too many distractions, no organizational skills, no priority settings Nearly every teacher commented on him not doing his assigned work. I can clamp down on him, but he has to take some responsibility on his own, or things will never change. He is so fucking smart, his PSAT's were really up there, but he refuses to put in the effort in school. Frustrating. You just know that at some point in his life, he will realize what he must do... just hope he doesn't waste too much of his time getting there.

Another back to work monday... blah... Well the work day is over and now I am chillin at the 'puter, and relaxin with a drink and a good book. Started a new Sci-Fi thriller by AC Clarke called The Trigger. The premise seems pretty neat. Its about the development of technology that renders guns and other weapons harmless. I guess it will be a social-political thriller about how this Anti-weapon will be used or abused, and the fight to control it.

Claire has been reading three consecutive books on Viet Nam and Cambodia, and the violence and genocide that was going on there during the war and the Kamir Rouge (sp?) regime. It affected her deeply, and said she had a good cry today from reading it. She says the stories of these peoples struggle to survive is incredible. These were middle class educated people who were forced into an incredibly harsh and tragic existence.

Yee-ha! After hours of work, finally finished the dreaded taxes. Thats, Federal, State, and Two Kids taxes. Besides fulfilling of ones duties under the law, tax time is also a fiscal look back at the past year. Based on that... the year sucked.

However, after completing our state and fed return... it looked like a fat refund was headed our way... but not so fast, its not over till its over, and after completing son and daughters return, we can kiss half that refund goodbye... Oh well! we will still get a tidy sum back which will go for something really cool... like repaving the driveway. ;-)

Last night-- Claire went to Women's NCAA at UCONN. Huskies win by 70 points. Went out to dinner with David, nice meal, nice company (not often get to spend the evening with my Son, alone). Worked on taxes, looks like nice refund due to a big loss on a stock I sold.

AM -- woke up early to drive David to work, lox & bagels and Sunday paper!

Read an article on Daryl Strawberry. What a story, the guy has reached the highest of highs only to plunge to the lowly of lows. Damn. The guy reached Major League status at 19 yrs, dubbed the next Babe Ruth or Hank Aaron, proved he had the stuff to do it. Ruined his career with crack cocain addiction, developed colon cancer, lost his kidney, cancer spread to lymph nodes, continues to use drugs, now is under house arrest with ankle monitor ... basically, now has lost the will to live. Doesn't much care about getting cured or kicking his addiction. That's alot to happen to one guy during a short life span. Sad, sad story.

Went to an Indian restaraunt in Manchaster CT last night. Wonderful Chicken Kurda (mild curry). Didn't think my stomach could take my usual HOT HOT Vindaloo. Anyway, the Indian cuisine hit the spot. Mmmmm.

This weekend's project... the dreaded Federal Income Tax.

I have always admired Mike Barnicle's gut wrenching, down to earth editorials. Here is a recent one thats excellent...

Teens Are Casualties Of War on the Home

Of course, as soon as something like this happens, they all shriek like hyenas, their words ending up in newspapers and on TV and meaning absolutely nothing.

I'm talking about the politicians who lunge for the microphones seemingly before someone like 15-year-old Charles Andy Williams has even finished shooting up a California high school, killing two, wounding 13.

The response is pathetically predictable. Democrats howl for more gun laws. Republicans urge that existing laws be enforced. Isolated academes, narrow-minded conservatives and know-it-all liberals are worse because their beliefs are soaked in arrogance. They continue to blame TV, movies, Eminem's songs, rampant permissiveness or the climate of violence choking our society.

I have always arrived at the intersection of these debates unarmed with statistics. I have only my eyesight, along with my observations from years of taking notes while talking to victims or simply staring at the bodies of dead young people, a tag on their toe, as they lay in a city morgue, any future just as dead as their sad past.

It is not simply the gun. It is not only the music, cheap videos, Saturday morning cartoons, playground bullies, commercialism, the absence of money or the lack of hope.

All this surely factors into the equation, but the big-ticket item — the common clue in almost every mad act committed by these kids — is what does, or does not, happen in the home.

The apology being made for young Williams is that he is slight of build, lonely and targeted by bullies. When do you suppose kids began bullying one another? A year before, or after, Christ was born?

Naturally, whenever it's one of these suburban kids — white and thin and innocent-appearing — many gasp in shock. This is not some black kid from the Bronx with a gun. That we can understand. But San Diego, Hanover, N.H., Williamsport, Pa.? My God, what's happening?

Here's what's happening: An absence of attention paid by parents toward their children. A lack of accountability that includes everything from homework to where and who they hang with Saturday afternoon. A country where peer pressure has disappeared, where the people upstairs and next door are strangers, mobility that breeds indifference and laws that make it possible for kids to acquire a handgun but make it impossible to say a prayer in school.

Only two died at Santana High. But because they were white and lived in a nice suburb, the story exploded coast to coast. Yet every single day, our cities are littered with the corpses of the young, some truly dead, many others among the walking dead. And then there are those stories, so common, so sad and so unknown to most.

In Syracuse last week, Christopher Ariola was charged with felony manslaughter after he allegedly beat his father to death with a baseball bat. He is 17.

According to a statement he made to Syracuse detectives, Ariola grabbed the bat and began to swing away after an argument over the volume of music being played on a radio. Then, after killing him, the boy wrapped his old man in a blanket, went bowling with a girlfriend, tried to commit suicide, failed and finally went to a pizza shop where he had once worked and told his former boss he had clouted the life out of his father.

"After the third hit, he doesn't say anymore," the 17-year-old said in his statement to police. "There's blood everywhere ... I bent down and I could tell he wasn't breathing. I checked, but he wasn't. I started crying. I said no, no, why did this have to happen, Dad, I love you."

Wait, there's more. In Brooklyn, a 16-year-old throws her baby out the window into an alley where the infant is devoured by a dog. In Des Moines, Wash., a police officer is shot and killed after stopping four teenagers walking along a highway 5 miles south of the Seattle-Tacoma International Airport. All four of the kids, ranging in age from 15 to 18, are suspects in the homicide.

And in North Augusta, S.C., the mother of the boy now famous for allegedly killing two in Southern California, divorced from his father for a decade, said she could not understand what had happened because he had seemed quite content the last time the two spoke, "earlier this year."

It is a whole lot more than just guns behind this madness. And it is the American family that has become the ultimate casualty.

No one should express surprise over the fact that the body count continues to grow.

I am a day late... but in case you didn't know, yesterday March 14 (3.14) was Pi Day. Its also Albert Einstiens birthday. Rachel showed me some neat sites including this one that calculates where in PI is the occurance of your birthday.. Lots of links to Pi sites from Yahoo.

Another tense situation at work. Again, not too much detail will be revealed here. Just to say that I had a heart to heart discussion with someone, got some things out in the open. My attitude now, is that if the environment here is not what it should be, I should make some changes in the way we do things... take the bull by the horn and take responsibility to fix it.

A couple of days ago, I mentioned that I needed a good reference for HTML4 and CSS styles, because I felt my pages were not coded properly with the latest syntax. So, I purchased HTML 4 for the World Wide Web--Visual QuickStart Guide, Fourth Edition. It looked like a good reference.

Well, the author starts the chapter on CSS style sheets with... The CSS specification is overly complex, overblown, unsupported on most browsers, and new browsers will support the older HTML for ever, so don't be hung up on using Style Sheets. Sounds good to me!

Have that sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. It is work related. Can't discuss details here... never know who might stumble across this blog (however unlikely), but I just don't have a great feeling about my professional life right now. I'll have to deal with it, but the anxiety is growing. Maybe its just my paranoia and is unwarrented, but there is no getting away from the feeling I have.

Hows that for saying alot, and nothing at all!

Been working this weekend trying to redo my Home Page using more of the CSS style sheets. Web Page development is changing so quickly, and I haven't really kept up. While most of the changes make sense, you can tell the influence of hard core programmers. It takes a real mind shift to understand how to code pages in HTML4.0. And now you have the problem of older browsers that won't understand the new code, and having pages look radically different, or just plain wrong with older software on the client side.

Why am I doing this? My wife things I'm nuts putting this effort into "meaningless" web pages. I just enjoy it, and I learn something that is somewhat valuable in this day and age. It will help me in some way at work as well, even though writing code is not my primary job.

Our cat Jordon... last week went to get fixed. They said his testicles were not where they should be, and he would need to have surgery to find and remove them. That day was today. Vet said he found one, then had to cut more to find the other. Do you believe it... his testes were in two different places. Poor cat is home, now he has that silly cone on his head like his sister did a couple of weeks ago.

Last night was "College Planning Night". It was quite a wake-up call. A new era is approaching for our son. To date, he has not prepared himself academically for the more selective schools. I am afraid that is not now an option. However, looking back at my own teenage years... the similarities are striking. He will get accepted to some school, and it is up to him to make the best of it. He is a resourceful, smart boy (man?) and will excell in what he decides to do. He will need to mature and become responsible for setting proper priorities in his life - something he has not yet figured out. The financial aspects of a college education are staggering, but most families get it done... and so will we.

I just came across this while clicking around on the web. EEK! Michael Jackson, I remember being mesmerized by your performance on that Motown special many many years ago! What happened to you to end up like this!

Re: the shooting in Santee CA. -- Will we ever learn? This is a very disturbing incident especially since there was some discussions between this kid and at least a couple of people warning that he was to do something like this.

And why isn't there more discussion about his access to his father's gun and several dozen rounds of ammunition! When will they begin to hold parents accountable for allowing this to happen. God, I know that if you have a teenage son, there is only so much control you can have over his actions... but if you have a troubled child, AND a gun in the house... "DUH!!!" you have to take some extrordinary precautions. Why did this guy need a gun in his house anyway?

Also, there is far too much tolerence in our society for kids being cruel to other kids. As a somewhat small, scrawny, geeky kid growing up, I felt victimized by bullies, and picked on... so I know the depth of the "pain" one feels being in that situation. Those things are tolerated to much in schools and homes (boys will be boys). Combine that with the desensitizing of guns, violence and killing in movies television and gangsta videos, and you have a recipe for tragic incidents like this.

I am certainly not the first person to say these things. Whenever a tragedy like this occurs, we here it all over and over again. Yet nothing seems to change.

OK, we got the "storm of the century"... actually we got about half of what was predicted-about 14 inches. Anyway, I got the day off work. Just finished shovelling the white stuff.

Spent the early hours of the morning watching part of the Ken Burn's Baseball DVD. I am not a big sportsnick, but something about the history of Baseball captures my imagination like nothing else. I watched the episode of the 50's. The Names, Casey Stengel, Jackie Robinson, Yogi Berra, Mickey Mantle, Joe Dimagio, Pee Wee Reese, Duke Snyder, Willie Mays... these are not "great men" by any means, but men whose characters are of mythical proportions. The Stories... Jackie Robinsons breaking the racial barriers in pro sports; Bobby Thompson's home run against Ralph Branca -the shot heard round the world; Yankee v Red Sox playoff game of 1949. The Places (shrines) Ebbets Field, Polo Grounds, Yankee Stadium, Fenway Park.

I realize that this is just Baseball... a silly game. But it is NOT "just" a game. It is a long season that plays out like a drama. It is a century of seasons with stories and characters that are more like fairy tales that were at one time an intricate part of Americana. It's a Wonderful thing.

The whole state of CT is prepping for this big storm. 12-28 inches they say. It was supposed to start yesterday afternoon, but so far... haven't seen a thing. Still, schools closed, ban on trucks, state workers sent home, the big companies in the state have closed down. I am just putting on my boots and going on in. Can you imagine if the whole thing just "peters out"! Ha!

JIC, I did cut up some firewood, fixed up and tested the snow blower, got some groceries. We'll see what happens.

Typical Saturday. Woke up, entered Fantasy Baseball stuff into Yahoo, drove Rach to basketball game (they won!), went to library, took out some jazz and fusion CD's for later converting to MP3, cleaned fish tank.... sounds exciting huh!

Actually, cut my first audio CD from MP3's... cool. Now I am grooving to some fusion tunes from the 70's, Chick Corea and RTF... very hot!

Sunday, we are getting ready for big snow storm to hit and run through Tuesday. Even chopped some wood for the fireplace. Should be a messy week. Come on-- when is that spring weather gonna come. Warm weather, softball and such.

Yesterday, went to NYC to the On-Demand Print Expo. IMHO, the Printing industry is in a free-fall. Bunch of old fogies attending a shrinking Expo for a declining industry, most of whom don't have a clue as to where digital communications are headed... and this segment (digital print) of the industry is supposed to be the best of the lot.

Anyway, it was worthwhile going, because I met my ol' college buddy. Great seeing you Jimbo - even if you are turning into a conservative mid-west republican! :-). Had a great lunch and it was nice catching up on old times. Hope we keep in touch. But give up the duck and deer hunting... its just not like you.